Self Portrait Challenge- "Resolutions #2"

NO MORE DRAMA

I have made a FIRM resolution in 2007 that I will not get sucked into my children's drama. Both girls are each in crisis mode right now and it's only the 9th of January. The oldest (seen in photo) has lived her whole life in drama mode and my illness seemed to improve after she moved (got booted) out. My youngest has gotten into a pickle of her own making, but now that she has TK I tend to stress over her choices and she doesn't even live here.
I'm a mother who allows them to clean up their own bad choices BUT I have been a sounding board for all of it. I feel sucked dry and spent, especially when all advise falls on deaf ears. I want to be supportive emotionally but it's getting ridiculous.
They agreed to work on leaving me out of their drama for the sake of my health in 2007. To show her willingness to try, my oldest, acted out a typical venting scenario for this weeks SPC. My face says it all!

One Deep Breath - "Subtle Change"

Instinct takes over
growing up
a path of his own

To see other subtle change haiku visit here

Sunday Scribbling - "Kissing"

Kissing can mean so many different things to different people but most associate it with love and affection. When I thought about kissing my first thought was of my husband and then my grandson. I felt I needed to mention a few other forms of kissing before I get to the fun kinds. There is the "kiss of life" otherwise known as mouth to mouth resuscitation which saves lives. "Kiss off" a not so romantic term and even worse, the "kiss of death" which in the mafia is fatal. There is also the "kiss of peace" signifying unity in the Christian church. Luckily I have only been told to "kiss off" from this list but a "kiss of peace" would be cool.

Watching my grandson kiss me with his mouth wide open is so sweet and pure slobber bliss! It’s a reminder that we learn to kiss and show affection as we grow. Mom and dad’s constant kissing of every soft precious fold, grandma and grandpa’s neck kisses that make you squish your body into a ball of giggles, to our sibling giving us raspberries on our tummies to make us squeal. They are our first kisses of love and adoration.

Kissing during our younger years is very different but at least we have learned to close our mouths by now and pucker. Opening our mouth comes back later, but I digress. Mom still kisses us when she can catch us but everyone else seems to hold back a tad, some more than others. My dad and grandpa were more reserved as I grew up, but that was back in the olden days. Siblings and some relatives have been know to have cooties, so we got more selective as we grew older unless otherwise ordered. I really disliked being made to kiss anyone as a child and never made mine do it. A hug was very different than a kiss and less gross for a kid. My parents stopped kissing each other and us at some point in my childhood, but I noticed it was not as unusual as you would have thought back then.

Kissing as an adult did not come as easily to me unless it was a passionate kiss with a man. I had that down pretty darn good with lots of practice in high school. I was a popular cheerleader with lots of dates and that was called a tease in my day unless you put out. Kissing and hugging any female other than my grandma took a concerted effort. I even toned down affection with my own girls as they hit puberty. "When you know better you do better" and I taught myself to break the cycle. It’s still a work in progress but I’m enjoying learning to express affection, especially to women I love.

Kissing Dave is a gift I treasure because the muscles in my lips and tongue are dying. Over salivation is a hindrance but I’ve learned some tricks ;) I want to savor every single kiss. If he catches me off guard my kisses are not very good but those are my personal favorites. It’s the emotion behind the kiss that matters so that if it is taken away the emotion is still very much alive. I don’t say "I love you" everyday to Dave because he knows. When I do say it to him it packs a punch! The same with my kids. Kissing and words are powerful expressions of love but I wanted to say we can show love in just a look. Try it, give that special person in your life a look that is full of all your love and do it when they don’t expect it and are not distracted. Watch their face as you kiss them with your eye’s ;)

Friday Catch Up/Create a Connection

Friday Funnies

On New Year's weekend we traveled 4 1/2 hours to Dave's mom's house. Before we left he helped me on with my socks and said "wow, your legs are more hairy than mine." I proceeded to remind him that I have never shaved my legs in the winter and he had the nerve to look surprised...men! On our road trip I put my slippered feet up on the dashboard, pulling my sweats back and socks down for all to see. I thought that would show him...NOT! He threatened to honk just in case they missed the show. I'll be mowing the legs this weekend while he's at the new house as a surprise :)

This picture is of the perfect gift Dave found for his gardening mom. A Victorian trike plant stand and he loved it so much he bought one for us. I captured part of her tree to show some of her vintage light reflectors, which Dave loves. We found some on eBay and I attempted to bid on the only two sets available. I must say bidding wars are ugly and I lost, but not before bidding an outrageous amount of money. I wanted to give Dave his childhood tree but instead I lost my mind ;)

Dave has been taking a new medication for muscle pain, insomnia and stress. The side affect is weird dreams...hmmm. Fixing up two houses, commuting 4hrs and me...ya think? The other night my hubby was straddling me in his sleep while poking me in my eye. Apparently he was fishing in his dream, I was the pole and my head was the reel...the fish got away! LOL I'm wearing a face mask to bed from now on because I'm no trout ;)

Create a Connection

This site created by Melba at http://www.bealivebelievebeyou.com/create/ is connecting bloggers. Deb at http://debrichardson.com/blog/ has a few questions for week one. It's a Wednesday getting to know you.

1. I have never wanted to be a Car Salesman ; but I've always thought I might like to be a Vet. I just could not handle putting them down when they are not sick or their family won't let me fix them. I'd be a pro bono vet :)

2. When I was 45 years old, I believed that I just might be here for a cure and I passed the year my mom died.

3. If I was my own best friend, what I would enjoy the most about spending time with Me would be my sarcastic sense of humor and adventurous spirit; while what I'd find the most irritating would be that I hate road trips and my directness. Superficial, insincere, Polly Anna's find me irritating. I love to call them on it because life's too short for sifting through the crap to create a relationship.

4. If the story of my life up to this point was being published tomorrow, it would be titled "A Warrior's Journey" which I WILL continue soon. My husband and friends motivate me ;) I would dedicate it to Dave.

5. When my time on Earth is over, and the people who loved me are remembering me, it would please me if they said " She showed me how to live with hope and laughter." I just pray God will see me as favorably as I see myself. LOL

Friday Firsts

Guess who turned a year old on December 29th? My grandson TK ;) He had a HUGE party and because he got spoiled on his first Christmas his parent's requested no presents. That did not include us grandparents of course :)
He was sick for Christmas and his birthday which he spread to his gramy tammy, but loved his first taste of sugar on his cake. (see slide show)

My husband and I were given the job of taking my daughter's first family portrait as their Christmas gifts but due to too many snotty noses we just got to it last night. Can you tell I faked a bigger fire? During dinner we finally got our first dusting of snow. (other snow pictures were from last year)

Oldest daughter is coming up this weekend to find a home up here. The Bay Area (big city) is just too expensive. I'm moving this summer and it can't come soon enough with both daughters living in the same town.

It feels good starting a new year!

Poetry Thursday

This was a poem written by my husband Dave. We exchanged poems for Christmas and I posted mine and now I'm posting his. My 17yr old lab, Manny, passed in November. This poem touched my soul! It was two pages and put over a picture of me and Manny. This was just a part of it but I'm bursting with pride and love over his thoughtfulness.


I Knew How Much You Loved me

On the day I went to rest
your love and friendship stood the test.
You held me close and spoke to me
until my eye's could no longer see.

Perhaps my time seemed all to brief
don't lengthen it now with undue grief.
My life was so full, you loved me so much
your words, your devotion, your gentle touch.

My life was so good because of you
giving me a home only known by few.
With all of my heart and all of my soul
I did what I could to keep you whole.

Sorrow fills such an empty space
so close your eye's and you will see my face.
You look for me but I'm not there,
but I'm in the sun, the rain and every breath of air.

The sun here is so warm, the breeze so cool,
tall grasses sway in this heavenly pool.
I still watch over you all through the day
knowing you will come home to stay.

A friendship shared, your laugh, a kiss.
These things too I will truly miss.
And when the time comes for you to take the great ride
I will rush to meet you and stand by your side.

Love Manny

To see other lovely poems go here

Self Portrait Challenge- "Resolution"

The challenge for the month of January is "How can we express our new year resolutions through photography and self portraiture?"

My first resolution is expressed in a haiga poem using my hand letting go. I worry far too much about the future and some of my control issues creep up from the past. Time is so precious and even with ALS I forget that...shame on me!

My resolution is to live in the here and now!

To see other resolutions expressed in self portraiture here

One Deep Breath- The New Year Haiku

Time is a gift

hope remains

live life

Prompt: The New Year

What does the New Year mean to you? Maybe you think of peace or renewal? It may be a time to reflect on the past year's joys and sorrows and/or focus on the future... or perhaps it is a time to contemplate the passage of time itself? Maybe you will notice the "firsts" of the New Year... or you might choose to write a traditional "positive" haiku to begin the year.

For other beautiful work visit here

One of our ODB members, Helen of Yellow Rose, needs our good thoughts and prayers. Thank you!