Sunday Scribbling - "Rooted"

Me sitting on my walker after a swim watching the tide come in.

When I was a little girl I felt so disconnected to my family that I believed and hoped I was adopted. My family was not creative, political, affectionate or good communicators. Growing up the differences grew as I began to listen to the voice within my head. I never felt deeply rooted to my family and its dysfunctional history. I needed to find my own way and left home at seventeen.

I was young and thought I knew who I was, but I didn't, as I slowly spun out of control. My early 20's were a blur and I felt like I was locked up inside, watching a train wreck. I knew my choices were wrong, but I had lost that rooted connection within. My voice was drowned out by negativity and silenced with selfishness. When I finally found my voice I had left behind a path of destruction. I vowed in the future to live my life by trusting my own voice.

I grew up and found spirituality and yet never felt deeply rooted to a church. I learned that I needed those years of bible study to realize that the voice I had followed all along was not just my own. It was a deeply rooted connection to God. No religion or politically correct wind could drown out the voice that guided me now.

When I walk through the woods the voice within gets clearer and so I seek out the places where I can hear it the best. I learned to listen, I know I'm never alone and I'm deeply rooted within. This poem is my favorite and yet I've never posted it. It needs to be on my blog, my journey.

FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was

walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the

sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he

noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one

belonging to him, and the other to the Lord. When

the last scene of his life flashed before him, he

looked back at the footprints in the sand. He

noticed that many times along the path of his life

there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed

that it happened at the very lowest and saddest

times in his life. This really bothered him and he

questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, You said that

once I decided to follow you, You'd walk with me all

the way. But I have noticed that during the most

troublesome times in my life, there is only one set

of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed

you most you would leave me." The Lord replied,

"My son, My precious child, I love you and I would

never leave you. During your times of trial and

suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it

was then that I Carried You."

Mary Stevenson