Saturday, July 14, 2007

Sunday Scribbling - "Hair"

I was always a high maintenance woman when I was working. I had the nice suits that had to be dry cleaned and the leather pumps to match. In those days I even bought nice under clothes that had to be washed by hand. I was hard on nylons, however, (yes, they wore those in the old days) so I always had an extra "control top" egg in my car. Do they still sell nylons in silver eggs?

So you're now starting to get the picture, but it didn't stop there, oh no. I had my hair permed, cut and highlighted at regular intervals along with acrylic "french tip" nails and toes. The finishing touch was constant grooming. I shaved and bathed every day and never left the house without my full make-up routine. I still can't believe how I raised two girls, worked full time and kept that up everyday.

Fast forward to an early, unwanted retirement being a useless house mom. I went from high maintenance to fried hair, broken nails and sweats. Being a single mom with a disability did not allow for a clean house or creative dinners, but I tried to keep my spirits high by dressing, bathing and adding a dab of lip gloss on occasion. I didn't want to embarrass my kids at soccer or parents night. It took four years to get comfy in my own skin and find a balance for retirement in my 30's. Not to mention the only man in my bed that would notice hairy legs had four of his own.

Fast forward to 4 years ago, when I began to date Dave. I had to find ways to feel sexy and yet still be me. Shaving body hair was the most challenging. It can be very dangerous when holding a razor with a shaky hand so I used the dreaded Epilady. It pulls your leg hairs out by the roots so you only need to use it once a month. You only cry in the spring when your leg hair is long enough to use a hedge trimmer. I did add a bit more make-up because at 46 bed head with the natural look can be scary. I still dressed casually but used flattering colors which is difficult to find with elastic waists.

My most daring move and biggest change was the hair. Two weeks before my wedding I cut it off with my husband to be by my side. Why? Washing and blow drying was zapping my energy after a taxing shower. I cried at first, because as a woman my hair was very important to me. Not only did the cut not look like the sexy Alyssa Milano from Charmed but I was GREY! Dave took me home and added some color. He decided he liked it but everyone knows men like long hair better (hey, he loves me). I cannot believe how freeing it was to cut it off and in doing so I realized that sexy comes from within. That's not a cliche' because I've lived it. I can be sexy with a boy cut, winter hairy legs and casual clothes. It's all in the TUDE!






36 comments:

kate said...

You look beautiful! I am so with you on the attitude. I can also understand going from working woman to disability maman because of a weird form of arthritis. That was 11 years ago when I was 38. Luckily, I have been able to continue gardening and taking on projects that I wouldn't have thought possible.

I think it's wonderful that you get to meet Pam, my blogging friend. You are both inspirations ... and your poem was beautiful.

Annie said...

I'm so glad I stopped by. This was such a grounding post. Once in awhile we need to ask ourselves what is truly important. I think that you were forced to figure that out a little earlier in life than most of us. Inspirational post. Thank you.

Star said...

You are beautiful through and through. And even tough it's probably not a Kosher thing to say about a guy, I think Dave is beautiful through and through, too.

I'm not so much into the dressy business clothes and nails and hair and such, but I admire those who can keep up on that kind of maintenance--just not my thing. I'd rather snuggle with the hubs for 10 extra minutes in the morning and save the dry cleaning dough for something more fun.

Your insights are such a gift.

Betty C. said...

You look great with your short hair! A very moving post...

LisaOceandreamer said...

As always you make me stop and really think about what's important.
As for your hair, it is SO cute on you it seems it was a style you've always had! If I could pull off a short, easy cut, I think I'd do it!
You are beautiful!
XOXO

Lucy said...

Thank goodness you added that gorgeous photo at the end of that post! My goodness Tammy, Your description of yourself had me picturing that witch in the snow white flick!. But look at you, OmG! You are a BEAUTIFUL woman! I dont care if you have winter hair! haha
Not only can short hair be freeing, but SO many of my clients tell me their husbands WANT them to wear short hair. It is Sexy and Mamma so are you! ( more so I'm sure than with sausage rolls!)
:)) great post!

Rob Kistner said...

Well, there you are Tammy -- you're lovely! Really enjoyed reading your post. You just be you girl -- David's a lucky man... ;)

Inland Empire Girl said...

I like your hair short. It is amazing how we change our life style when situations change. When I divorced and moved to a rural area I had to give up dry cleaned stuff, nails, and high maintenance hair. Now I am relieved! Excellent, honest post.

emmapeelDallas said...

You are beautiful, my friend, and you have the perfect face for short hair; I cannot imagine it long.

Great post.

Judi

pepektheassassin said...

Tammy. The man in your bed had four.... Legs? He had FOUR legs??? Hmmmm.

I have never been high maintenance. My stylish clothing has sort of slipped from levis and sweatshirts and flip flops to sweats and tennis shoes. Except on Sunday for a few hours, or when one of my kids has a wedding....

However, YOU LOOK GREAT! Fun post!

gautami tripathy said...

That made very interesting read. As you say, it is all inside our head. That is what is important.

I am one of those who does not bother how I look. I seldom wear any make up other than Kohl and mostly plait my long hair.

PS: You look so cool in short hair!

Tinker said...

You are so right - and just judging from the pictures that I've seen of you, I would say (and I bet your Dave would agree) - you've still got 'it'! So flaunt it, lol!!
xoxo

Chris said...

I think you look Fabulous. Seriously. Hairy legs or not, you're lookin' good and I'm sure Dave would agree!

spacedlaw said...

You are looking great in that picture, so you should not mourn longer hair. By the way not EVERY man prefers long hair: my boyfriend saw pictures of me with very short hair and insisted that I cut my hair (I was sitting on it by the time I finally gave in).

paris parfait said...

Tammy, you are beautiful and you look fabulously chic with short hair! Lots of men love this look and what's not to love? xo

Becca said...

Your short hair suits you so well, I can't imagine you without it. You look lovely and confident in this picture, and that's true beauty.

I always learn so much from reading your posts about your life. You're a marvelous story teller, with a great story to tell :)

Tracy said...

Seeing your cute hairstyle makes me want to cut my hair short again and say to heck with trying to grow it out! :)

Jennifer said...

I love your post! It was like reading my biography! I use to do the career thing, now I'm home in PJ's and I'm just not healthy enough to keep up the vanity...LOL For some reason though, the Good Lord keeps giving me energy to keep up with these boys. Most days....LOL
I love your short hair! Maybe I'll do the same? Mine lives in a permanent headband. I just don't have the time or energy to do anything with it!
Your hubby sounds like a 'love you for who you are' kind of guy!

Pam said...

I hear you, Robin! My hair is gone, too. But it wasn't the hair that taught me the lesson, it was learning to age with grace.

Crafty Green Poet said...

You look wonderful in your photo!

Gill said...

I love your short hair. My daughter had the exact same style as you and is now growing it out and I am SO sad, I love her with her short "cheeky" hairstyle.

Sandie said...

This was a great post!

nicole said...

hey tammy! i haven't been around in awhile, but am glad to have happened upon you again at ss.

i think you look stunning with short hair! and i have always thought i looked better with short hair too!

cheers to you!

Patois said...

What a great post. And a wonderful photo of you. I don't know that men prefer long hair. I think they believe they're supposed to. My husband much prefers my short, short cut -- akin to your length -- than the hair I had down to my waist. Of course, he's pretty bald so...

Kamsin said...

You look totally gorgeous Tammy! Dave's a lucky guy, short hair, hairy legs and all!

Tori said...

I reflect everyone's comments here...you look fabulous and have an incredible attitude. Thanks for humbling me...

Bongga Mom said...

Like everyone else, I think you look wonderful, sexy, glamorous, beautiful. Your hairstyle only adds to your femininity. Hold your head up high!

Remiman said...

Tammy,
Obviously I didn't know you before...Right now you are amazingly beautiful, inside and out. When ever my days seem damp I think of you and I'm uplifted.
rel

Nancy said...

Hey Tammy,
It's so interesting when we change...but it's incredible when we evolve.

You, my friend, are quite the evolver.

And yes...it's all in the tude!

Love,
Nance

giggles said...

Dear Tammy
You are one amazing woman! You should be the poster girl for true beauty, inside and out! Girl, not only do you know how to pick music, Damien’s my favorite! You are full of love, honesty, and reality. We could have been soul sisters with that extra pair of control tops in the car, full makeup, showered, shaved and shining daily! Funny how we must grieve the old us, in order to except the new one! In the end we aren’t so much what we look like, but more what we exude! It really is about the tude, and girl yours is top notch!!! Wonderful post just like you!!!

Love and hugs Sherrie

Jane Poe (aka Deborah) said...

It *is* all in the TUDE & you have it in spades. Thank goodness you & your hair found a more comforatable solution to this place in life ... and even MORE importantly, thank goodness you found Dave (and he found you) as the two of you forge a place in this world that works for both of you. Lots & lots of love to you beautiful Tammy. xx, JP

turquoise cro said...

YOU are one HOT BABE!!! I'm still trying to get my hair cut shorter, had it short once and liked it, I don't know what's stopping me! It will grow back!

daisies said...

you are so right and your short hair is super sexy cute :)

ouch ~ epilady ... i once had that torturous device ... eep!!

Jimmy said...

Hey, version 1, version 2, I still thinks ya looks great!

LOL... L'Eggs! YAYYY!

chiefbiscuit said...

I love your short hair and how it shows the great bone structure of your face. You really suit short hair, I can't imagine you with longer. I loved reading this.

Clare said...

Hi Tammy! You and your hair are absolutely GORGEOUS! You look totally feminine and I love the color, too.
:)