Thursday, August 31, 2006

Poetry Thursday - "To My Daughter"

This weeks prompt encouraged us to pick a favorite poem and keep it with you through out the week. I kept to the theme in a round about way because the poem I chose was in my heart as I watched my last daughter get married. I've been editing the pictures all week seeing her face shine in joy. I chose this poem because it was in my heart but not in my pocket :)

I looked at you today
and saw the same beautiful eyes
that looked at me with love
when you were a baby
I looked at you today
and saw the same beautiful mouth
that made me cry when you first smiled at me
when you were a baby
It was not long ago
that I held you in my arms
long after you fell asleep
and I just kept rocking you
all night long
I looked at you today
and saw my beautiful daughter
no longer a baby
but a beautiful person
with a full range of emotions and feelings
and ideas and goals
Every day is exciting
as I continue to watch you grow
And I want you to always know that
in good and in bad times
I will love you
and that no matter what you do
or how you think
or what you say
you can depend on
my support, guidance
friendship and love
every minute of every day
I love being your mother

By Susan Polis Schutz

See other entries here

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Self Portrait Challenge- "Enclosed Spaces"


Have you ever tried to walk a day in someone else's shoes? My husband Dave is amazing and I could never fill his shoes. His day begins at 3:00am and he starts his two hour commute to an eight hour job. His job is mentally and physically draining. He commutes home again in traffic for two more hours, only to come home and make dinner. He does the dishes, makes coffee for us both for the next morning and winds down by watering his garden (see wedding pics below). He showers and shaves and off to bed we go.
Next summer he retires at fifty and we will move to our new retirement home, but until then he spends weekends taking care of two houses 3hrs away from each other. Fixing one to sell and one to move to, both having big yards. The other things that need a lot of his attention are me, my two dogs and a cat. I need help with various things and they need food and water. He also does the laundry and shopping once a week. He is the best! What's even better is he chose this life by marrying a woman with ALS, two hours from his job, with a house and two dogs. I feel the love in this man's boots :)

One Deep Breath- "Faces of Humanity"

Family is love
staying together is life
home is family

Homeless but smiling
hungry but all together
will love be enough?

Monday, August 28, 2006

Wedding Pictures

The wedding was gorgeous! Everyone was on time and nothing went wrong :) The happy couple were gone by 11:00am and off to a big family and friends BBQ reception. We happily missed that event and I took a nap :) They both have big families 3hours away and they did a faux ceremony for them. They got their sunrise dream wedding thanks to Dave and my best friend Lynne. Friday before the wedding Michelle was a true bridezilla and things were hectic but by sunrise things were smooth. Sunday I rested and was grateful I had no more daughters. LOL

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Wedding Time!

I'll be running around supervising the decorating and keeping the super stressed bride from losing her mind. Time is flying by with lots to do, so I'll have to catch up with you next week. I'll have a few pictures for you too:) Have a great weekend! XXOO

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Self Portrait Challenge- "Enclosed Spaces"

I've decided to try "Enclosed Spaces" the easy way this week. I tried to squeeze under my bed and even though my breasts are in my armpits, I got stuck and hubby had to pull me out. I also crawled under my computer desk but since my butt went south and never returned, it hurt and again I had to be pulled out. Hubby now thinks I'm even more nutty than before so this week is for him :)

My eyes have always been my best feature, even through my younger years when "the girls" were perky and I had a rear. Since my diagnosis I see everything differently and they sparkle even brighter from the beauty of an ordinary day. Before I was blind but now I see and I'm soaking it all in. Here is a haiku poem enclosed with my eyes in a field of poppies.

Monday, August 21, 2006

One Deep Breath- "The Sound of Music"

Music is a gift

freeing emotions within

healing can begin.

Notes long forgotten

transport us into the past

memories revived.

Photos from stock-xchng

See other great "Sound of Music" haiku here

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Sunday Scribbling - "Inner Life of Pets"

My name is Manny and I’m the protector of this home and my people. Against my will I also watch out for the retarded white fur ball and tolerate a CAT! My main duties are to bark when someone comes to the door and scan the yard for predators so "princess fur ball" will come out to pee safely. Might I add she pees too much and takes forever! My favorite job is to watch over mom and I never leave her side because sometimes she falls down. When I was a younger dog, I could stiffen my neck and front legs so she could grab the back of my neck, and pull herself up. I liked that because I got lots of extra love.

I’ve lost a few of my people, I guess because they got bigger and I sometimes can’t find them. I miss the goodies they snuck me under the table. If that’s not bad enough they were the ones who brought home the retarded fur ball and then they had the nerve to leave it behind. Why is it that a small fur ball gets all the lap attention and I get good dog pats? If I hear how cute she is one more time I swear I’ll hurl on mom’s carpet. What’s worse than protecting three female people and one furry she-mop? Mom bringing home a MALE! Now I just had to put my paw down! He was nice and all but he thought he was the man of the house...ha! This MALE booted me out of my bed and brought a CAT to live here, a CAT! If he did not make mom so darn nice and happy, I’d have run him off already. Sometimes I’m not liking how he treats mom in MY old bed, so I whine and pace to make him stop. I guess he can stay for now but I got my one good eye on him.

Now that I’m getting up there in age my eyes have turned what mom says is a lovely shade of blue. I walk right into that MALE humans’ legs and I’m thinking it’s not my eye’s, but his stick like ghost legs. He gets so mad . . . hehehe. I have had a dog stroke and been bitten by a spider and yet I still get my but up when fur ball has to pee at night. Now mom watches out for me and even finds my baby when I lose it. The MALE will even play tug of war and usually lets me win. I can still bark but I get my cue from the shrill of "fur ball’s" bark and act like I heard it the whole time.

I guess something is going to happen around here soon because the "fur ball" got a hair cut looking even more ridiculous and I’m being fitted with a girlie white bow . . . hmmm. This could mean food and people, maybe even the two I keep losing and that tiny person that smells bad.

This dog world is full of people and fur balls trying to steal mom's attention from me but mom makes sure I know I'm her very special man-dog every day. . . take that naked fur ball !

Check out other "Inner Thoughts of Pets" here

Friday, August 18, 2006

A New Friend and a Walk of Life

Meet my friend Helen :) She's in her fifties and has been happily married 27yrs to J. Together they have three children, two school age grandchildren and a business. She was a very athletic woman who hiked mountains, worked out, loved boating and helped raise her grandchildren. She was also a legal secretary too boot! 3yrs ago she showed signs of ALS and 2yrs ago received the diagnosis. She is now in a wheelchair and has lost the use of her right hand and like me, slurs her speech. She loves poetry, reading and loved scrapbooking until she lost the use of her right hand. She has a strong faith and a loving supportive family and now us :) I hope she loves blogging and is embraced by this amazing group of people. Welcome fellow warrior! Find Helen at

Many of you have been working out lately so I thought I'd throw this out there. If you go to in the top left corner you can enter your state or zip code to find the nearest "Walk to Dfeet ALS" walk. It's a fun event and you can walk off the pounds too!
Thanks :)

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Poetry Thursday-"Free Week"

I've found a little poem in a book about friendship and I thought it really explained why I have a blog. We are all connected and have a story to share. Thank you for touching my life with yours :)

There are great human needs which
money has no power to satisfy, but to
which a little heart's gentle love will be
the very bread of God.

There are sorrows money cannot
soothe, but which a word of loving
comfort will change into songs.

The abundant life may not have money
to give and yet it may fill a wide community
with blessings. It may go out with sympathy,
with comfort, with inspiration of cheer and
hope and may make countless hearts
braver and stronger.

J R Miller from the book "Joined at the Heart"

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

One Deep Breath- "Coffee Haiku"

Checking email
caffeine boots up my hard drive

ready to begin

Awake in a fog
following the aroma
hot liquid lingers

Photos from stock.xchng

See other "coffee & Tea" poetry here

Monday, August 14, 2006

Self Portrait Challenge-Enclosed Spaces-Shopping

I went shopping this weekend and found myself engulfed(enclosed) in clothing. So many cute things but few that fit my criteria. No button or zippers, must have elastic and not tie, must be petite in length and cute but not too young...Hehehe. I find there are perks in shopping with me, like great parking, a walker to hold all the clothes and luxuriously large dressing rooms. I came home with decorative crop sweats with matching shirt in black, so much for HOT! :) is where I found a fun way to show one picture in many ways.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Sunday Scribbling - "Who Else Can I Still Be"

There are so many things I'd like to have done in my life but fate had a different plan.

I can still be a loving wife, making sure he does not get overwhelmed in my care. Hiring extra hands so he can remain a "husband" and not just my caregiver.

I can still be a good mother by allowing my kids to make mistakes and get themselves out of their own binds. Spending quality time with them by allowing them to assist in my care when they need to. I want them to live their lives now and allow me to live mine.

I can still be a loving grandma by showing love through my eyes. Teaching compassion and empathy. The gift of my blog showing them my words of love.

I can still inspire others to have faith, hope and live every day as a gift.

I can still pray for others.

I can still fight.

I can love.

He's Going to be Ok!

The mass has shrunk to a golf ball size and no malignant cells seen...WooHoo! Reaction cells, bruising and scabbing says a bite caused it. The drugs made him pant all day and night but he is going to be fine and able to be in the wedding. A white bow will look like a tuxedo and he will probably lay at Shell's feet during the ceremony. It is his yard and he adores Shell :)

Thanks for your prayers, it helped me get through it. I am so happy my pal is a fighter like his mom.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Poetry Thursday- "Unfinished Conversations"

Mom married too young to the wrong man at 16. She was a strict mom who showed little affection. I later realized she was a very unhappy woman with her life choices. I hated her for the verbal abuse but always needed her approval. When I had my children I had hoped for a new and better relationship with mom but at 44, my age now, she died. It was a scuba diving accident that suddenly took her away. I felt sad and relief at the time but now I feel I know her better. We left our relationship unfinished so I felt inspired with today's theme to write a poem. Today is her birthday.


I stood at the open doors in a mindless shock
walking the red path with eyes focused on you.
It finally felt real seeing you lying there so still
I looked at you wondering if you loved me at all.

Over the years your unhappiness smoldered into a
consuming rage that burned all who tried to love you.
I took cover from your rage fleeing into the flames
I became all that you feared I would be. I was you.

It was my turn to be filled with rage and sadness
you left in a heartbeat with so much left unsaid.
You never allowed me time to grow into my own
so I could show you a woman worthy of loving.

Life got my attention making me wish you were here
but you would be proud of the woman I've become.
I took my power back setting a new path filled with
obstacles I'm happy to jump, just breathing the air.

Looking back I see you through a woman's eye and
a mother's heart knowing how life can beat you down.
I have forgiven you your trespasses knowing the depth
of your pain. I will always remember you loved me.

Happy Birthday mom, I love you too.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Round Robin Photo Challenge-"Summer Garden"

Gardening is a true calling for my hubby and has brought color and joy to my life. rRose of has asked "How does your garden grow." I found some pictures of how are garden looked this summer. The deer were eating Dave's flowers the other night so he has sprayed smelly stuff all over the flowers to keep them away. He's fighting mad so they better watch out! We need these flowers to dress up the yard for my daughter's sunrise wedding. The yard won't be very bridal with just stems and leaves.
His Begonias that he adores
Our swing with white rose petals
BBQ among the flowers
We have four 8 ft Jasmine bushes up against the house near windows. We hope the neighborhood likes the fragrance ;)

See other gardens here

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Self Portrait Challenge- "Enclosed Spaces"

WEEK #2 as "embrace"

This week was a rough week and I needed extra TLC. I got the idea of an embrace for my enclosed space and I liked it even more as a painting. Hubby says it looks like we have a skin disease so I am showing my two different versions and you can decide :)

One Deep Breath- "Scenic Routes"

Growing up as a kid most of our vacations were spent in a RV. We traveled all over the united states on some pretty amazing scenic routes. I was entering puberty and hated every minute of it. I crawled up above the drivers seat and buried myself in books. I missed some really beautiful scenery. I was moody and brooding as some teenagers do being confined with parents and a pesky brother.

Sounds like menopause! LOL I wish I could do it over again and enjoy the view...or maybe not. I've hated long car rides ever since.

Driving across states
pages turning, states a blur
plumes of gas floating

A home on wheels
crammed in a box, I can't breath
brother on last nerve

See other scenic routes here

Monday, August 07, 2006

Trying to Focus

Swelling is down and infection is being treated but a mass remains. A biopsy will be done tomorrow and we will know more. Manny has been pampered and spoiled in every possible way, which put this smile on his face. Mommy has been stressed and sad but since that effects my illness, I am thinking of all the happy times. I could not really find anything left for "Poetry Thursday" and " Sunday Scribblings." I did read many of them though and as usual they were fantastic!
Her royal highness was none too pleased that she was not the focus of our attention this week and has been sulking. When Manny gets his pills wrapped in cheese, Nikki gets cheese. When Manny won't eat neither will Nikki and when Manny drinks extra water because of drugs so does Nikki. Her bladder is much smaller...Grrrr!
Dave's birthday is the 13th and I got him tickets to see Randy Travis in concert, at an outdoor theatre, months ago. My best friend offered to watch Manny so we could go. I'm not a big fan of country music but I do watch American Idol. The opening act for Randy Travis was Carrie Underwood who had won that show. Dave really likes old country music and enjoyed the show. It was after he worked all day and comuted for four hours. It started at 8pm and we got home at do the math. He really enjoyed it though and He even liked Carrie. Especially when she belted out her rendition of a Dolly Parton song called "Jolene" which happens to be the song that inspired him in naming his only child Jolene, 24yrs ago...too cool! I really enjoyed them both and each act had some goosebump moments. Carrie sang "Jesus take the wheel" with the audience swaying, their arms reaching for the sky waving their concert lights back and forth. Thousands of lights reaching for God in the dark was an awesome sight. I needed that moment! I even did the mosh thing when she belted out her own rendition of an old "Guns and Roses" tune and I'm sure I looked like I was having a seizure. Randy's closing song was a 911 song that ended with a HUGE American flag rolling down behind him...very cool!

This is the amphitheatre where the concert was held. It's a winery surrounded by gardens in the middle of nowhere. Very beautiful but not disabled friendly, which tired me out getting to our seats. I happen to get seats on the farthest side from the entrance and had to walk in front of lots of people on the know I just loved that:( They graciously called for a golf cart to escort me back to the car when the concert was over.

Thank you for all your Manny prayers and support:)

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Self Portrait Challenge-Enclosed Spaces


I had to get my 16yr old dog to the vet this morning because his leg was swollen and he could barely walk. This is me in the back seat of my friend's car, comforting my best friend Manny. He has watched over me for so long, now it's my turn to watch over him. I'm terrified of losing him! The vet said cancer or a snake bite and we won't know until the swelling goes down. Drugs have already helped with the pain. I'm praying he comes out ok!

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

One Deep Breath- Garden Haiku

My view out back

Blooms spiraling up
color spreads bottom to top
swaying in the breeze

My backyard where daughter will wed Aug. 26th at sunrise.

Blooming witnesses
waiting for a blushing bride
path to her future

photo from stock.xchng

Shadows from above

shelter from scorching sun

basking in blue hues

To see others go here